Naw, I don't really read books.
It's the 21st century.
We think in images now, in video, in audio.
Those books are all from before MTV, from before those dogs barked
those Christmas songs.
Books are just skeuomorphs, lumps of coal decorating the motors
of our solar cars.
(I learned that word from a beer ad)
(I learned that metaphor from an Arby's ad)